A beginner’s guide to the Virtual Dinner Party

Posted on 21 April, 2020

If there is one thing that brings me joy, it is cooking for friends, gathering them around my table and partaking in rollicking conversations, wine and music.

So it feels especially hard to be in ‘iso’ on a Saturday night when it would normally be dinner-party-central at our house.

Not to be deterred, this weekend my friends and I determined we would press on regardless and devote our Saturday evening to each other—virtually.

We had no idea at the start about how we would run our ‘virtual dinner party’, but it took on a life of its own and was definitely a highlight of four weeks of #isolyfe.

So by all means, consider throwing your own virtual get together—it was an absolute hoot and really did show us that connections can be maintained online.

Here’s what we did.

Step 1) Menu and wine planning

We decided we would try and cook roughly the same things as each other. The two other couples are serious foodies, so the challenge was on to come up with a ‘meat’ dish, a ‘potato’ dish, a salad, and a ‘chocolate’ dessert.

One couple chose wines from Farrah’s Liquor Collective and they were dropped at our door on the Saturday morning. Contactless delivery: tick.

Another couple was responsible for sending out the Zoom invites, while their daughter set up a separate Zoom for the five kids so they could have their own socially responsible get-together.

Step 2) Get everyone on the same page

We decided we would start at 7 pm, and just to keep everyone on the straight and narrow, these were the instructions:

The order of events for this evening’s State-sanctioned festivities is as follows:

1. Decant your bottle of The Marriage Shiraz at around 6 pm (it needs air to shine).
2. Prepare your dinner to be ready for 7 pm and have it on the table ready to begin.
3. Have a glass of the 2010 Towerhill Riesling to prepare your palate for dinner.
4. At 7 pm, click on the Zoom link.
5. Idle chit chat whilst those new to the 21st Century work out how Zoom works.
6. Dinner served with The Marriage Shiraz for those eating tasty, tasty meat. The Towerhill Riesling for the remainder.
7. At some point here our 40-minute time limit will run out and the zoom meeting will end. I will restart the same meeting and you then re-join as per the instructions above.
8. More idle chit chat.
9. Dessert accompanied by your choice of post-dinner beverage, as per the guidance above.
10. Matt will yawn.
11. Wind up to the evening with statements like “I have such a long way to drive home, maybe we should Uber” followed by polite but non-committal laughter.
12. End the meeting.
13. The evening will be a great success if we follow the above “12-step” program.

Step 3) Set the mood

Meanwhile, I created a Spotify playlist—Canberra Corona Kids Virtual Dinner Party.

As all quality playlists do, it was bound to meander down the path of the 80s, with each song subtly reflecting the times we are in. ‘Don’t Stand So Close to Me’, ‘Things Can Only Get Better’, and ‘Doctor! Doctor!’ were among the first on the playlist—you get the drift.

Everyone spent their afternoon cooking and, in my usual fashion, I ensured the house was spotless and the floors were mopped, even when my husband reminded me that no-one was, ah, actually coming inside the house to notice the floors. DETAILS, Paul!

All of my recipes for the night are now safely ensconced on the HerCanberra Instagram account in the Cooking ‘highlights’, but I had a grand old time making a chocolate raspberry tart, a potato dauphinoise, a garden salad and a Greek-style marinated lamb.

Danielle and Aaron had tomahawk steak with a medley of mushrooms, a warm salad of baby spinach, roasted sweet potato, carrot and asparagus and a chocolate mousse with raspberries.

Heather and Matt had eye fillet steaks and a salad with roasted sweet potato, chorizo, prawns, capsicum and red onion, with avocado and a creamy mustard dressing. Dessert was raspberry balls dipped in dark chocolate.

Step 4) Get dolled up

As the hour approached, we all got out of our tracksuits and set the table. We set two laptops up—one on the kids’ side of the table and the other on ours.

At the stroke of 7 pm, we Zoomed and toasted to ourselves (as per the instructions!).

Step 5) Have a ball—virtually

Much laughter and hilarity ensued as we tried to queue our Spotify playlists together, but you can’t be perfect at everything. We sent each other photos of what we were eating, while I tried to stay sober enough to Instagram it.

Meanwhile, the kids ate their meals and took their laptops away to other rooms where they engaged in a few online games—so no change to what they’d normally be doing.

We didn’t really notice when they left because honestly, it was as loud and raucous as it always is when the six of us get around a table.

After what seemed like five minutes (but was actually 40) our first Zoom timed out, and it provided a perfect toilet break/chance to clear dishes/opportunity to top up wine.

Both the chosen wines were delicious and it was fun to compare tasting notes, knowing we were all drinking the same thing.

Step 6) Keep the party going

The night progressed, there were many more Zoom dropouts, and many more toasts as we managed to reconnect on our screens. The kids put themselves to bed, I think. I was not paying attention. I was too busy dancing.

And as is usually the case, the men eventually drifted away around 11 pm to leave the women to continue chatting. Which was fine until the Zoom timed out and everyone else in Heather’s household who knew how to log in was asleep.

While technology enabled this beautiful connection of isolated humans in Canberra in the end, it was technology which ended it too.

Despite a desperate lunge across the living room to plug in my laptop, it died around midnight. Not to be prematurely quietened (we had only been talking non-stop for five hours) Dan and I picked up the conversation on FaceTime on our phones. But then, my phone died. Perhaps it was a sign. Note to young players: have all of your devices fully charged before you start dinner.

It was a brilliant experience and felt every bit as wonderful and restorative as hanging out around my dining room table. The only drawback is that while it may have been a virtual dinner party, the hangover the next day was all too real.