Oh Lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes-Benz? Pretty please?

Posted on 12 November, 2019

In the interests of full disclosure, I will admit that I already drive a Mercedes-Benz.

In fact, you could call us a Mercedes-Benz family as my husband and I have owned four of them over the years. But after last week getting to run around town (and beyond) in one of Mercedes-Benz Canberra’s newest arrivals, the GLC 200,  I am desperate, truly desperate, for an upgrade.

When I bought my car, a C250, I was on the cusp of turning full soccer-mum. With two growing kids and the need to pile boot-loads of stuff (read school bags, sports bags, shopping bags, groceries, yoga mat etc etc) into a car, I was a living cliché.

I ummed and ahhed about the merits of an SUV of some description, feeling slightly envious as my friends threw veritable piles of things in their boots and always had room for more. They seemed to enjoy the spacious driving, and held a position of lofty power in the school-pick-up and drop-off queue. And if an extra kid or two needed to be thrown into the mix, so be it.

But in the end, I played it safe, and settled on the C-class sedan. The trade-off was it was a turbo and I felt a little bit more sophisticated for driving it.

Now I realise the error of my ways. My first experience driving an SUV began last week when I picked up a brand spanking new, shiny black beast. She had me at her clean lines and elegant curves. I barely noticed how large she was (she rivals the BMW X3 and the Volvo XC60) as her proportions were so beautiful. Then I drove her.

All I can say about that is that driving the very latest Mercedes-Benz is a little mind-boggling. And very nearly like being in a sci-fi movie. We are talking taking motoring technology to the point where the car is technically a more adept driver than you are. You can trust the car to anticipate danger, driver error, fatigue, lack of skill and, hell, it will even park itself for you.

I cannot go into every detail of just how gob-smackingly clever the car is, because we would be here a week. But in a nutshell: it has cameras everywhere and an enormous touch screen on the dash which provides rear and overhead views of exactly where the car is at all times. The car has sensors which tell you when you are veering too close to the lane lines, or if another car is approaching too close, or you are tailgating.

A heads-up display on the windscreen picks up speed signs as you drive past them and alerts you when you meet or exceed the limit. This was something of a revelation for me and it was so easy to stay within a comfortable speed by simply flicking my eye over it while staring out the windscreen. Certainly, it is less effort than looking for the street sign as I pass, checking my speed down on my dashboard and repeating the process a few hundred metres down the road.

The car literally has every whistle and bell—the stereo rocks, you can set all sorts of ambient lighting throughout the interior and adjust the height of the back door with the touch of a button.

Call out “Hey Mercedes” and the car will do anything you ask, from making a call, turning on the seat heaters, to switching between radio to your Spotify playlist.

In terms of safety, a feature that provided me enormous peace of mind was a red button located above the rear vision mirror which automatically calls an emergency team at Mercedes-Benz. If, heaven forbid, you are in an accident, you need only push that button and assistance can be summonsed.

I even hear that Margaret McGrath, Mercedes-Benz Canberra’s marketing manager, was side-swiped by another vehicle recently, and within seconds, Mercedes was alerted by the car to the crash and automatically checked in with her to make sure she was OK.

But enough about features—what was she like to drive? That was the most surprising bit. Even though this car is significantly more spacious than my sedan, it handles just as lightly. It is scary how quickly you can reach 110kms on the highway, and despite my fear she would be impossible to park in the car parking chaos that is Saturday basketball, she was incredibly nimble. Both my kids were highly excited by the new model and not at all keen to revert to the old one.

And that’s the thing. My car is not that old, and yet the technological advances made in that time makes it feel like it rolled off the First Fleet. Dammit! I now have car envy.

I begrudgingly handed back the keys and considered selling my handbag collection on eBay as I drove away old school-style. As if sensing my burgeoning love, the GLC 200 (still tethered to my iPhone) alerted me the minute they moved her on the lot.

How clever that your car can tell you where to find it. No more panic attacks in the Canberra Centre carpark for one thing. But sadly, we are no longer together despite our clear connection.

I just hope she misses me as much as I miss her.

Visit the team at Mercedes-Benz Canberra on 16–17 November to take advantage of their Nineteen Million Dollar Sale Event.

Mercedes-Benz Canberra, Canberra Avenue and Tom Price Street, Fyshwick, 8 am–5.30 pm Monday to Friday, 8.30-4 pm. Call 6175 5500 or visit the website.

This is a sponsored post written in partnership with Mercedes-Benz Canberra but the opinions are the Mercedes-loving author’s own. For more information on our sponsored post policy, you can read here.