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Modern Dating: Is online the way to go? Part II

Joanne Michelle

I recently walked around the city during lunch time and noticed heaps of gorgeous men, only to find them on their phones.

So are they all in relationships? Or are they perhaps all swiping in hopes of finding the one?…Or perhaps trying to reach the next level on Candy Crush?

Either way, they weren’t looking up to see who was around them, that’s for sure.

Since being single I’ve tried many dating apps and have met some amazing men and, well, let’s just say some not so amazing ones.

My last blog I shared about web-based dating and what it’s like (you can find it here), this week I want to share with you app-based dating.

If you are not in a position to pay high premium rates, app dating may be the way to go for you

Popular dating apps you can find in Canberra are Tinder, Happn and Bumble.

Yes, there are still costs involved if you choose premium options, but what you can achieve from these apps for free will have you meeting new people in no time.

They’re linked to your Facebook profile but no, there’s nothing being posted to your Facebook wall for all your friends to see. You can upload a few photos, write a small bio and you’re ready – it’s that simple.

To be honest, I love Tinder

How it works: Profiles that fit your preferences (such as gender, age range and location radius) pop up when you log into the app and you either swipe left (no) or right (yes) depending on your impression. On their profile, you’ll see their picture(s) and description. You also have the opportunity to link Tinder to your Instagram profile.

It may seem that I’ve become shallow making instant judgements, but it’s easy, accessible and you learn to trust your impulses. Once you match (they have to swipe YES to you too for this to happen), you can start having conversations via chat and potentially meet really lovely people.

Tinder is simple and easy because you can literally swipe, match and start courting before the minute is over. Your matches are usually in the same area as you, which makes them easier to meet in person too. I say usually because with a paid membership you can choose to look anywhere around the world.

Being a free user, the only questions you really have to answer is your distance preference and age preference and a few minor notification options. With the premium subscription, you can have a little more control of who you can see, you don’t have to disclose your age and location, and you can have the option to

Being a free user, the only questions you have to answer are your distance preference, age preference and a few minor notification options. With the premium subscription, you can have a little more control of who you can see, you don’t have to disclose your age and location, and you can have the option to backtrack if you accidently swipe NO when you meant YES.

Tinder is quick and easy and you will find plenty of people to meet if you desire, whether it’s for a friend, a hook-up, or a relationship.

Bumble is a relatively new app and is starting to make its mark in Canberra

This app is not as popular as Tinder but it’s slowly growing. Bumble is similar to Tinder, however, if you match with someone, you have 24 hours to connect with them. Yes, the WOMAN has 24 hours to make the first move (did a guy invent this app?).

The setup and preferences are pretty similar to Tinder too.

Happn is slightly different and while it’s new, it’s growing

This dating app may seem a little creepy at first.

After downloading the app for a day or so, you’re notified of potential connections based on where you’ve physically been.

You can literally see where you were and where a potential match was – usually less than 500 metres away. You can click on the ‘love heart’ and hope for a match (meaning they have to ‘heart’ you too) or send them a ‘charm’. A charm will notify the person who you have crossed paths with that you are interested. There is a subscription where you can purchase more charms to help you along the way, just in case the one you’re interested in has not liked you back. This app gives you free charms to start with.

You can also post different icons such as ‘going to the movies’, ‘out for a drink’, ‘a walk’, ‘a run’ or ‘dancing’ etc and people you cross paths with will see that this is what you are up for and can join you by sending you a heart or charm. It’s fast, works smoothly and is sure to get you some connections, although the number of users in Canberra is not as great as in other cities – yet.

These apps are simple, easy and your inbox will not be bombarded like web-based dating

You can meet for free with a simple swipe of your finger, a chat and then the highly recommended phone call before you actually meet (check out the Do’s and Don’ts post here).

Let’s go back to Tinder for a moment. You may have heard that it’s only good for one thing… The reality is, it can be, however, it doesn’t have to be. You have a choice as to how you interact with people online.

The people using these apps come from all walks of life. Yes, there are the ones that are looking for a night of fun. But there are plenty who are looking for the ONE, and ample others looking for everything in between. It really comes down to what you want and for you to learn how to communicate this and select accordingly.

I like these three apps – they suit what I’m looking for. The question is, what are you looking for? Don’t be afraid to try if you’re ready to get out there and start dating.

I say ‘Thank You’ to online dating

For online dating has given me the opportunity to meet men who I am sure I would never have met otherwise, potential partners and new friends and men from different walks of life.

In short, it’s been a wonderful journey for me, full of nice connections and respectful dates. I hope this has enlightened you about the world of online dating.

Until next time, happy swiping.

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Joanne Michelle

Joanne is Founder of Joanne Michelle and is a certified Health Coach and Divorcee who has set up Canberra’s first one-on-one break-up coaching program; offering health and wellness advice and practical techniques to help provide much needed support to women after their break-up or divorce. Joanne’s mission is to support and EMPOWER women to rediscover their identity after their break-up or divorce. With lack of support during her own personal experience, Joanne wanted to ensure women have the much needed support on offer. Going through a break-up or divorce can often be a mentally and emotionally devastating time, not to mention stressful. With this in mind, Joanne is now providing a coaching service to support women after their break-up. Joanne is caring and approachable, and knows first-hand, life doesn’t end once you divorce. For more information, please visit www.joannemichelle.com.au or email [email protected]

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  • Maddie

    Bumble was actually developed by a woman (who was also one of the initial people at Tinder). The woman making the first move means that she also has a higher degree of control – because it is women who receive the higher amount of abuse and inappropriate material on Tinder. It’s not for everyone, but it’s a softer version of Tinder.

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