What I learned from my car accident
Posted on
Do you ever have those days where life just feels perfect?
I was feeling like that on the weekend. I’d gotten an amazing new job, I was about to move into a new swanky apartment, I’d spent the weekend with friends, was really enjoying my training… in short, I was feeling like I’d won the life lottery. And then…. BANG.
Not a metaphorical bang – bang as in, metal on metal, glass smashing, loud bang. I was in a car accident.
Luckily nobody was seriously injured. I was also luckily that my wonderful friends were in the car in front of me and were able to pull over and run to help.
I completely understand that it could have been a lot worse and trust me, I’m counting my lucky stars. At the same time, it was pretty unpleasant and left me feeling scared, sad and stressed.
Speaking to people about it, I’m quite shocked at how many people can relate. At one stage or another, many of us are in accidents – involving a vehicle or otherwise – that leave us injured, whether it be physical, emotional or both. It’s hard to imagine how difficult it must be for people who suffer major injuries.
This might sound totally ridiculous but after I made sure everyone was ok, one of the first things I thought when I realised my car was a write-off was “how the ‘F’ am I going to get to the gym?”.
I realise it seems silly and maybe it was just because of the shock, but it was actually representative of a much bigger issue, which is the loss of independence and routine. I adore my routine…I love getting up early, listening to my music as I drive to the gym, making myself breakfast back at home… it’s one of the ways I look after myself and keep myself healthy and happy.
As I said, I’m endlessly lucky I didn’t seriously hurt myself but I did get hit pretty hard and am sore all over – especially my back. I was disappointed when my doctor told me to avoid heavy weights and intense training. “Light aerobic exercise should be fine”. Fabulous.
So what do you do when life throws you a curveball and you find yourself in a position where your health and fitness routines are taken away against your will? Here’s my advice for dealing with this kind of set back.
GET SOME ADVICE
It’s a good idea to get yourself checked out by a health professional if you’ve hurt yourself. A GP is a good start, as they can help you and/or point you in the direction of a specialist or an allied health professional like a physiotherapist or chiropractor.
Even if you don’t have a personal trainer or coach, it can be good to get a consultation with one if you’re experiencing pain or discomfort and are unsure of what your limitations are. Drawing on the advice of your doctor or health professional, they can give you some pointers on where to start and what you can do.
Among other excellent advice, my trainer Tom told me to take a few rest days, which to be honest I was dreading hearing. However, his advice took some of the guilt out of slowing down my training. That brings me to my next point…
IT’S OK TO REST
This is seriously a case of me needing to take my own medicine, but sometimes it really is ok to rest.
If you’re a reasonably active person, taking a few days or a week off isn’t going to affect your fitness levels. In fact, you’re more than likely doing your body a big favour.
I’ve been surprised at the number of people who’ve told me about injuries they’ve trained through, only to cause more damage.
Unfortunately, if you’re a reasonably active person, you’re also going to probably struggle with resting. Exercise feels good and for many of us it’s a way to de-stress and elevate our moods.
Resist the urge to push your body and just do what you can. If you’re up to it, a walk or a gentle swim are good ways to stay active without putting too much stress on your body and can be really therapeutic, especially when you bring a good friend who’ll listen to your troubles.
IT’S OK TO ASK FOR HELP
… and to accept it when it’s offered.
I don’t know about you, but when I feel down sometimes I want to hide away from people. It’s not easy to show people that we are vulnerable, and sometimes it can feel like we’re burdening people with our problems; however, I have been blown away by the kindness and compassion of friends, colleagues, family and acquaintances.
My good friends have been lifesavers, listening and offering help where they can. Just by being open about what happened, I’ve received so much love and kindness. One colleague offered to help me move next week, and one of the guys who works at the coffee shop at my office offered to lend me his car in January. When the accident happened, a Good Samaritan stopped and helped me out of my car and brought me water when I couldn’t breathe.
Being open to receiving help and kindness, and even just taking the time to acknowledge and appreciate the offer, can make life seem a lot less dark and scary.
IT’S OK NOT TO BE OK
We live in a social-media driven society obsessed with perpetual happiness and success. I don’t think this is always a bad thing – it’s good to be positive, have gratitude and celebrate the wins – but it’s really important to remember that it’s ok to feel grief, sadness and disappointment too. As humans, we all feel the full spectrum of emotions.
Like many of us, my family has a real “solider on” attitude. “Have some resilience” my mum said, “you’re strong and you can get through this!”
The truth is, I have felt and still do feel really sad about it. I don’t know if it was the shock or the realisation that the accident could have resulted in the loss of the life of others (and my own)… but there you have it. I’m sad. And that’s ok.
We all have unplanned, unfortunate things happen to us that threaten our lifestyle. Suppressing the grief or shock can be really unhealthy. Give yourself some time just to be sad and ‘feel the feelings’ – even if it’s just for an hour or two – so that you can move on.
TAKE ACTION
Lastly, don’t let it defeat you. It’s ok to feel down but there’s real value in recognising your own strength.
When you get injured or something bad happens, it can feel like your world is caving in and you’re helpless. The truth is that you’re not.
We can all take at least small actions to help us on the road to recovery and normalcy. This can be finding an alternative (even if it’s temporary) like training in another gym or even in your lounge room.
Maybe your circumstances are worse than that and you’re in rehabilitation and can only work on small movements and mobility. A friend of mine was training for a marathon when he ruptured his Achilles and could only do calf raises for weeks on end, and I’ve always admired his resilience and perseverance. It’s a good lesson to learn: focus your attention on what you can do, not what you can’t. This will help to offset some of the feelings of hopelessness and help you on the road to recovery.
Lastly, don’t ever let something bad happening to you take away the positives. Reach out to the people who love you, count your blessings and never take for granted being healthy, happy and alive.
Leave a Reply