Elizabeth Lee: a Letter to my Daughter

Posted on 19 February, 2019

Becoming a first-time mother is a daunting time for any woman, let alone a member of the ACT Legislative Assembly.

Ahead of the birth of her daughter later this year, Elizabeth Lee MLA pens a heartfelt letter. 

Dear Daughter,

In just a few short months, we will get to meet you as we welcome you into our world.

You have already filled our lives with a range of emotions that we did not think possible and I can only imagine that you will continue to do so as you grow into a strong, courageous, fearless woman.

You came to us after a heartbreaking circumstance and you are so valued and so loved – not only by dad and me but also by your grandparents, aunts and uncle and so many dear friends.

I’m sorry that I put you through a stressful time as I faced some professional challenges just as we knew you were creating a nice little home inside me. Thank you for thriving against the odds; for being strong when the circumstances seemed to be against you.

I hope that you will get to know, respect and love your Korean heritage. I was so lucky to have the best of both worlds – growing up the daughter of Korean migrants who sacrificed so much to make sure that I and your aunts had a better life here in Australia. That experience taught me to value family, community and the positive contribution that I, as a 1.5 generation Korean migrant, can make to Australian society. Your dad is as Aussie as you can get – his family has been in this beautiful country for hundreds of years but he is also very proud of his Scottish (and some Irish and English) heritage going back generations.

I apologise in advance that I can’t drop you off at school every day; that I can’t make every single play, sports carnival or awards presentation. I know how valuable that is because I had the privilege of having a mum who could and would do all that.

I hope that as you grow older, you will respect and appreciate the duty that I have to the people of Kurrajong. The best thing that any of us can do is contribute to society in the best way each of us can. Some of us have a talent for art or music to bring beauty into this world; some of us have a brain to solve problems we couldn’t even imagine. And for me, it is the privilege of being able to be a voice for those who may not be in a position to do it for themselves.

I hope that you will also be proud of the fact that your mum made history (yeah, I’ll be your daggy mum but I swear I did!) as part of the first female majority Parliament in Australia (go us) and also as the first elected member of an Australian Parliament from a Korean background. It wasn’t done on purpose but neither of these things were by accident; it was a result of resilience and amazing support from your dad, your grandparents and aunts and a huge team that really believed in me.

Whatever your way of contributing to this world, know that you will always have our full support. It won’t always be easy and there will be times when you want to give up but know that worth doing takes effort, resilience and will.

Each time I miss a school pick up because I’m serving the people of Kurrajong; each time I miss a sports carnival because I’m holding the government to account; each time I miss an awards ceremony because I’m governing for the people of the ACT (let’s hope after 2020 this is the case!) I hope that you know it’s not because I care any less but because I have a duty in carrying out the oath I affirmed as I took office. And, in discharging my duty, I hope I can be a good role model for you. We are nothing if we don’t hold ourselves to our word and I hope that your dad and I can show you that through our actions as you grow and strive to achieve everything you want to do and be.

I hope that by the time you are contemplating your career, it will almost seem laughable but today – as I write this letter – it is a sad reality that women in parliament, especially mothers in parliament, is still out of the norm. It is a reality that there is still so much that needs to be done to address domestic and family violence in our society; it is a reality that no one seems to have solved our growing waste and climate change concerns; and it is a reality that there is still so much stigma surrounding miscarriage, stillbirth and infertility and that you will be proud of me for sharing our story. It was and is difficult but if we can make one woman, one couple, one family feel a little less alone then it is another way of being a voice for those who are not in a position to do it for themselves.

I also hope that by the time you are reaching adulthood, you will be able to contribute to a generation that achieves a world where our gender, ethnicity and sexuality don’t define us but the strength and depth of our integrity as human beings.

Perhaps you will get your cheekiness, humour and sense of adventure from dad (and having his height wouldn’t be bad either – but even if you get your height from me, trust me when I say it hasn’t stopped me from achieving everything I wanted). And, even if we embarrass you later on, know that dad and I aren’t too bad on the dancefloor so we hope you’ll take after us in loving letting your hair down (just do it in moderation).

We have four months to go before you will join us in our world and I know it won’t be an easy journey for us. Know that dad and I are doing everything we can to make sure you are healthy, happy and growing stronger each and every day.

Stay strong and stay resilient because we can’t wait to meet you.

Love,

Mum