Taking The Cake: The Changing Face Of Kids’ Parties

Posted on 16 August, 2018

Three-tier cakes, horses dressed as unicorns, flower walls—are kids’ parties becoming the new wedding?

When Lydia Sims turned up to her friend’s four-year-old daughter’s birthday party, she found herself walking around shocked.

“There were waiters holding canapés, a petting zoo, floral displays, champagne fountains, a three-course seated meal, two jumping castles and three-tier cakes,” she says.

“When they went home, every child received jewellery. The whole thing probably cost more than my wedding.”

Twenty years ago, children’s parties used to be relatively simple—parents would call their local fast food store and book a table, perhaps grabbing a half- melted ice-cream cake along the way or paper hats if they were feeling particularly festive.

Now most children’s parties are akin to weddings: think three-tier cakes, flower walls, heavily detailed decorations matching a specific theme, gift registries and live entertainment. There isn’t a fairy bread or ‘pin the tail on the donkey’ in sight.

One quick look through
social media group ‘Party Mums’—a forum for parents to post photos and share ideas
for parties—shows the level of creativity and detail parents are going to when planning.

One poster had a ‘My Little Pony’ themed party complete with grazing platters, an appropriately themed dessert buffet and real-life little ponies for children to ride.

Another ‘high tea’ themed party included delicate china tea settings for each child, floral bouquets, candles and pearls; while a recent pamper party included pedicures, champagne fountains (filled with juice) and a dessert buffet.

Some mothers in the group scramble for last-minute birthday ideas; others admit they started planning for their child’s first birthday as early as when their baby was still in the womb.

And while the rise of Instagram and Pinterest are certainly responsible for the more
lavish trends, there’s also the celebrity factor.

When Beyoncé’s daughter Blue Ivy turned four, the budget was close to $270,000 for her fairy princess party, complete with extravagant floral arrangements, fairy chairs and hanging greenery.

Closer to home, shoe designer Terry Biviano has made an artform out of her daughter Azura’s birthday parties—her most recent included life-sized unicorn statues, three dessert carts and a gigantic three-tier unicorn cake with a gold spiral horn. And it’s not just birthdays that are getting a look-in: you can’t scroll for long on Instagram before finding a perfectly styled baby shower, gender reveal or christening celebration (there have even been a few ‘first tooth’ parties, complete with tooth-shaped cakes.)

But while celebrities may have cash to splash, the average parent doesn’t have the same budget.

Yet many are spending more than ever: about 26 per cent of parents told BabyCenter.com that they spent more than $500 for their little one’s first birthday, while Sydney event stylist Phillip Carr recently revealed his clients drop anywhere from $10,000 to $50,000 on their children’s events.

Someone who has seen her fair share of children’s parties is Madlin Sims, the owner of local business Capital Kids Parties, which provides entertainment and decorations for parties in Canberra and its surrounds.

Madlin believes Instagram and Pinterest have had a “massive influence” on the way people are hosting children’s parties now.

“Before that, people never really got into colour themes, creative games or these elaborate party gifts—they’d just get the standard lolly bags from the supermarket,” she says. “Now it’s all very detailed, parents are really getting into the whole thing: entertainment, dessert buffets, decorations, party favours and games.”

So are parties becoming less about the kids, and more about parents fulfilling a creative outlet?

“Oh for sure,” says Madlin. “When you’re a parent, everything you do is about your kids. And I think parents feel guilty when they take time out for themselves or have a hobby, so planning a party for their kid is kind of the best of both worlds, it’s for the child but it’s sort of also for the adult.”

Madlin says one of her more extravagant requests was a ‘Mad Hatter’ themed children’s birthday party, with a high tea at Hyatt Hotel Canberra.

“The mum hired a Mad Hatter, Alice in Wonderland and a White Rabbit entertainer. For the party, they had to act out scenes from the book. It was over the top but very cool.

“Our customers vary, however— some are single mums who love having parties for their kids but try not to go overboard in spending, then we have other customers who say ‘I don’t care how much it costs, this is what I want.’”

She adds that one of her most popular requests at the moment is for unicorn parties—“and everyone’s still asking for Elsa [from Frozen] or Spiderman at their parties.”

Madlin agrees there is more pressure on mums and dads now than ever before to keep up with the changing trends.

“I think that’s in part because of social media, everyone’s looking at people’s lives so easily now, you can see what others are doing and you feel like you should be doing it too,” she says.

“I think that goes for not just parties but all aspects of parenting—you feel guilty about things you shouldn’t feel guilty about. There can be an element of competition with these parties when they are posted on social media, but I think it’s subconscious—not because we want to be better than that person, more that we would like that for our child too.

“It can be really hard when kids go to a fairly extravagant party and don’t know why their parents can’t afford to have petting zoos and ponies too, because the younger kids don’t yet have a grasp that some people just have more money than others. But I think if you can educate kids early on about that concept, then they can have an understanding.”

One publication providing daily party inspiration is Hooray, a locally produced website and magazine that vows to “celebrate the art of entertaining.” Editor Emily Coates says she has seen everything from large-scale balloon installations to extravagant flower walls at children’s parties.

“We’ve seen it all; from horses dressed as unicorns to extravagant flower walls smothered in thousands of roses… some parties spare no expense,” she says. As for trends, they “change like the wind”, but at the moment, unicorns, glamping sleepovers, mermaids, boho and woodlands themed parties are very much ‘in’, according to Emily.

“We’ve also seen dessert trends come and go,” she says.“Lately, we’ve been seeing a lot of grazing tables, doughnut walls, naked and semi-naked cakes, smash cakes and drip cakes.

“Also, number cakes from the 1990s are on their way back—but not the classic sponge cake you’ll remember. The new number cake is ornately decorated with puffs of cream, fresh fruit and florals.

“Anecdotally, parents are spending more time, money and energy on kids’ parties than they were 10 years ago.”

Mother of two Louise Pye, of Fadden, says she usually spends three to four months planning for parties for her boys Henry, 1, and James, 4. This includes sourcing decorations, ordering cakes or cupcakes and sending out invitations to fit the theme.

Some of her party themes have included Winnie the Pooh, Woodland creatures and Peter Rabbit.

“For our Winnie the Pooh celebration our decorations included a beehive smash cake, cupcakes with edible bees, a tree with hanging beehive cookies,” Louise says. “For the Woodland party, our cake was a tree stump with a 3D bear on the top, and we had cupcakes with edible toadstools. The kids— and adults—loved it.”

Louise says she always sets a budget of about $300–400 and usually sticks to it.

“I think everyone wants a party that is Instagram-worthy these days,” she says. “Gone are the days of dragging mattresses into the lounge room for a girls sleepover. Now every child gets an individual tepee with fairy lights and matching PJ sets. If you love party planning like I do, this is great, but if you don’t you may feel pressured to match what other parents are doing— which can be exhausting and financially straining.”

The key to avoiding party-planning stress, according to Emily, is to “just go with the flow and enjoy it.”

“It doesn’t have to be huge and expensive. It doesn’t have to be a Pinterest-perfect DIY affair. After all, the kids aren’t going to care whether you DIY’d the décor,” she says.

“My advice is to think about what the mini partygoers will find fun and centre the occasion around that. Clear a play space and plan age-appropriate activities to keep the kids entertained—a colouring in table, some fun dancing music and a floor scattered in balloons will do the trick.”

Madlin agrees that going back to basics and remembering who the day is for, is the best approach.

“While it is nice that these parties can create great memories, at the end of the day I don’t think parents should put themselves into financial hardship trying to outdo one another or because of the pressure—they should remember that they are the centre of their child’s universe and that’s what matters.”

*name has been changed

Images: Courtesy of Hooray Magazine

This article originally appeared in Magazine: Taste for Winter 2018, available for free while stocks last. Find out more about Magazine here. 

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